Charles Xavier, Professor of synthetic organic chemistry. All his papers have been accepted without passing for any referees. Legend wants that the only things he needed was to call the editor of the journal. Most of his students work for 72h non stop, and they don’t even know why. Hates comic sans.
Cyclops, Post-Doc. MALDI expert, some undergrads have seen him recording the MALDI-TOF by simply watching the matrix. His red-filtered fashion safety goggles are also perfect for red fluorescence and raman. The goggles, however, make almost impossible to use a pH paper. Do not ask him to prepare a buffer solution (he is a Post-Doc, so he will not do it anyway).
Iceman, Post-Doc. His ability of preparing cooling bath is renowned in all the department. Busy all day long with cooling NMRs, preparing cryo-TEM samples and random -78C cooling bath for other people in the lab. Looking for the 0K.
Beast, Post-Doc. He is simply a living safety issue and he is not a good view when he is fully shaved. Trying to make his way up in computational chemistry. Some people are allergic to him.
Wolverine, PhD student. Amazingly precise in cutting TLC, silicon wafers and scratching preparative TLCs. Still in doubt if he can get close to the NMR or not. He is usually banned from the lab when some other students are trying metal catalysis.
Storm, PhD student. She was hired for changing the weather while working. Since then no one in the lab said anymore: “look what beautiful weather outside and we are closed in the lab”.
Banshee, PhD student. Whit him in the department the ultrasonic baths have become obsolete. No fused glass joint can resist his power. Pay attention: the guy can be quite annoying when asking questions during the group meetings.
Pyro, PhD student. A living bunsen burner, no solvent will remain liquid in his hands. Distillation wizard, no vacuum needed. Never. Quite good in elemental analysis as well. t-BuLi his favourite reagent.
Rogue, undergrad student. She is currently studying for his MSc. No one really knows why she is walking around the department touching as many chemists as possible.
Magneto, technician. Can fix whatever instrument in matter of 5 minutes. When in a huge centrifuge can also be used to record a NMR. Do not mess with him if you want to find your stirring bars tomorrow.